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supreme fulfilment she would never enjoy？ Why was she so cold； so
unroused； so indifferent？
As they went home； and she saw the many； hateful lights of the bungalow；
of several bungalows in a group； he said softly：
〃Don't lock your door。〃
〃I'd rather； here；〃 she said。
〃No； don't。 We belong to each other。 Don't let us deny it。〃
She did not answer。 He took her silence for consent。
He shared his room with another man。
〃I suppose；〃 he said； 〃it won't alarm the house if I go across to happier
regions。〃
〃So long as you don't make a great row going； and don't try the wrong
door；〃 said the other man； turning in to sleep。
Skrebensky went out in his widestriped sleeping suit。 He crossed the big
dining hall； whose low firelight smelled of cigars and whisky and coffee；
entered the other corridor and found Ursula's room。 She was lying awake；
wideeyed and suffering。 She was glad he had e； if only for
consolation。 It was consolation to be held in his arms； to feel his body
against hers。 Yet how foreign his arms and body were！ Yet still； not so
horribly foreign and hostile as the rest of the house felt to her。
She did not know how she suffered in this house。 She was
healthy and exorbitantly full of interest。 So she played tennis
and learned golf； she rowed out and swam in the deep sea； and
enjoyed it very much indeed； full of zest。 Yet all the time；
among those others； she felt shocked and wincing； as if her
violentlysensitive nakedness were exposed to the hard； brutal；
material impact of the rest of the people。
The days went by unmarked； in a full； almost strenuous
enjoyment of one's own physique。 Skrebensky was one among the
others； till evening came； and he took her for himself。 She was
allowed a great deal of freedom and was treated with a good deal
of respect； as a girl on the eve of marriage； about to depart
for another continent。
The trouble began at evening。 Then a yearning for something
unknown came over her； a passion for something she knew not
what。 She would walk the foreshore alone after dusk； expecting；
expecting something； as if she had gone to a rendezvous。 The
salt； bitter passion of the sea； its indifference to the earth；
its swinging； definite motion； its strength； its attack； and its
salt burning； seemed to provoke her to a pitch of madness；
tantalizing her with vast suggestions of fulfilment。 And then；
for personification； would e Skrebensky； Skrebensky； whom she
knew； whom she was fond of； who was attractive； but whose soul
could not contain her in its waves of strength； nor his breast
pel her in burning； salty passion。
One evening they went out after dinner； across the low golf
links to the dunes and the sea。 The sky had small； faint stars；
all was still and faintly dark。 They walked together in silence；
then ploughed； labouring； through the heavy loose sand of the
gap between the dunes。 They went in silence under the even；
faint darkness； in the darker shadow of the sandhills。
Suddenly； cresting the heavy； sandy pass； Ursula lifted her
head； and shrank back； momentarily frightened。 There was a great
whiteness confronting her； the moon was incandescent as a round
furnace door； out of which came the high blast of moonlight；
over the seaward half of the world； a dazzling； terrifying glare
of white light。 They shrank back for a moment into shadow；
uttering a cry。 He felt his chest laid bare； where the secret
was heavily hidden。 He felt himself fusing down to nothingness；
like a bead that rapidly disappears in an incandescent
flame。
〃How wonderful！〃 cried Ursula； in low； calling tones。 〃How
wonderful！〃
And she went forward； plunging into it。 He followed behind。
She too seemed to melt into the glare； towards the moon。
The sands were as ground silver； the sea moved in solid
brightness； ing towards them； and she went to meet the
advance of the flashing； buoyant water。 ＇She gave her breast
to the moon； her belly to the flashing； heaving water。＇ He stood
behind； enpassed； a shadow ever dissolving。
She stood on the edge of the water； at the edge of the solid；
flashing body of the sea； and the wave rushed over her feet。
〃I want to go；〃 she cried； in a strong； dominant voice。 〃I
want to go。〃
He saw the moonlight on her face； so she was like metal； he
heard her ringing； metallic voice； like the voice of a harpy to
him。
She prowled； ranging on the edge of the water like a
possessed creature； and he followed her。 He saw the froth of the
wave followed by the hard； bright water swirl over her feet and
her ankles； she swung out her arms； to balance； he expected
every moment to see her walk into the sea； dressed as she was；
and be carried swimming out。
But she turned； she walked to him。
〃I want to go；〃 she cried again； in the high； hard voice；
like the scream of gulls。
〃Where？〃 he asked。
〃I don't know。〃
And she seized hold of his arm； held him fast； as if captive；
and walked him a little way by the edge of the dazzling； dazing
water。
Then there in the great flare of light； she clinched hold of
him； hard； as if suddenly she had the strength of destruction；
she fastened her arms round him and tightened him in her grip；
whilst her mouth sought his in a hard； rending； everincreasing
kiss； till his body was powerless in her grip； his heart melted
in fear from the fierce； beaked； harpy's kiss。 The water washed
again over their feet； but she took no notice。 She seemed
unaware； she seemed to be pressing in her beaked mouth till she
had the heart of him。 Then； at last； she drew away and looked at
himlooked at him。 He knew what she wanted。 He took her by
the hand and led her across the foreshore； back to the
sandhills。 She went silently。 He felt as if the ordeal of proof
was upon him； for life or death。 He led her to a dark
hollow。
〃No； here；〃 she said； going out to the slope full under the
moonshine。 She lay motionless； with wideopen eyes looking at
the moon。 He came direct to her； without preliminaries。 She held
him pinned down at the chest； awful。 The fight； the struggle for
consummation was terrible。 It lasted till it was agony to his
soul； till he succumbed； till he gave way as if dead； lay with
his face buried； partly in her hair； partly in the sand；
motionless； as if he would be motionless now for ever； hidden
away in the dark； buried； only buried； he only wanted to be
buried in the goodly darkness； only that； and no more。
He seemed to swoon。 It was a long time before he came to
himself。 He was aware of an unusual motion of her breast。 He
looked up。 Her face lay like an image in the moonlight； the eyes
wide open； rigid。 But out of the eyes； slowly； there rolled a
tear； that glittered in the moonlight as it ran down her
cheek。
He felt as if as the knife were being pushed into his already
dead body。 With head strained back； he watched； drawn tense； for
some minutes； watched the unaltering； rigid face like metal in
the moonlight； the fixed； unseeing eye； in which slowly the
water gathered； shook with glittering moonlight； then
surcharged； brimmed over and ran trickling； a tear with its
burden of moonlight； into the darkness； to fall in the sand。
He drew gradually away as if afraid； drew awayshe did
not move。 He glanced at hershe lay the same。 Could he
break away？ He turned； saw the open foreshore； clear in front of
him； and he plunged away； on and on； ever farther from the
horrible figure that lay stretched in the moonlight on the sands
with the tears gathering and travelling on the motionless；
eternal face。
He felt； if ever he must see her again； his bones must be
broken； his body crushed； obliterated for ever。 And as yet； he
had the love of his own living body。 He wandered on a long； long
way； till his brain drew dark and he was unconscious with
weariness。 Then he curled in the deepest darkness he could find；
under the seagrass； and lay there without consciousness。
She broke from her tense cramp of agony gradually； though
each movement was a goad of heavy pain。 Gradually； she lifted
her dead body from the sands； and rose at last。 There was now no
moon for her； no sea。 All had passed away。 She trailed her dead
body to the house； to her room； where she lay down inert。
Morning brought her a new access of superficial life。 But all
within her was cold； dead； inert。 Skrebensky appeared at
breakfast。 He was white and obliterated。 They did not look at
each other nor speak to each other。 Apart from the ordinary；
trivial talk of civil people； they were separate； they did not
speak of what was between them during the remaining two days of
their stay。 They were like two dead people who dare not
recognize； dare not see each other。
Then she packed her bag and put on her things。 There were
several guests leaving together； for the same train。 He would
have no opportunity to speak to her。
He tapped at her bedroom door at the last minute。 She stood
with her umbrella in her hand。 He closed the door。 He did not
know what to say。
〃Have you done with me？〃 he asked her at length； lifting his
head。
〃It isn't me；〃 she said。 〃You have done with mewe have
done with each other。〃
He looked at her； at the closed face； which he thought so
cruel。 And he knew he could never touch her again。 His will was
broken； he was seared； but he clung to the life of his body。
〃Well； what have I done？〃 he asked； in a rather querulous
voice。
〃I don't know；〃 she said； in the same dull； feelingless
voice。 〃It is finished。 It had been a failure。〃
He was silent。 The words still burned his bowels。
〃Is it my fault？〃 he said； looking up at length； challenging
the last stroke。
〃You couldn't〃 she began。 But she broke
down。
He turned away； afraid to hear more。 She began to gather her
bag； her handkerchief； her umbrella。 She must be gone now。 He
was waiting for her to be gone。
At length the carriage came and she drove away with the rest。
When she was out of sight； a great relief came over him； a
pleasant banality。 In an instant； everything was obliterated。 He
was childishly amiable and panionable all the day long。 He
was astonished that life could be so nice。 It was better than it
had been before。 What a simple thing it was to be rid of her！
How friendly and simple everything felt to him。 What false thing
had she been forcing on him？
But at night he dared not be alone。 His roommate had gone；
and the hours of darkness were an agony to him。 He watched the
window in suffering and terror。 When would this horrible
darkness be lifted off him？ Setting all his nerves； he endured
it。 He went to sleep with the dawn。
He never thought of her。 Only his terror of the hours of
night grew on him； obsessed him like a mania。 He slept fitfully；
with constant wakings of anguish。 The fear wore away the core of
him。
His plan was to sit up very late： drink in pany until one
or halfpast one in the morning； then he would get three hours
of sleep； of oblivion。 It was light by five o'clock。 But he was
shocked almost to madness if he opened his eyes on the
darkness。
In the daytime he was all right； always occupied with the
thing of the moment； adhering to the trivial present； which
seemed to him ample and satisfying。 No matter how little and
futile his occupations were； he gave himself to them entirely；
and felt normal and fulfilled。 He was always active； cheerful；
gay； charming； trivial。 Only he dreaded the darkness and silence
of his own bedroom； when the darkness should challenge him upon
his own soul。 That he could not bear； as he could not bear to
think about Ursula。 He had no soul； no background。 He never
thought of Ursula； not once； he gave her no sign。 She was the
darkness； the challenge； the horror。 He turned to immediate
things。 He self from the
darkness； the challenge of his own soul。 He would marry his
Colonel's daughter。 Quickly； without hesitation； pursued by his
obsession for activity； he wrote to this girl； telling her his
engagement was brokenit had been a temporary infatuation
which he less than any one else could understand now it was
overand could he see his very dear friend soon？ He would
not be happy till he had an answer。
He received a rather surprised reply from the girl； but she
would be glad to see him。 She wa