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deprived of their ironwork： the nails flew to the mountain ， and the
unhappy crew perished amidst the disjointed planks。
JULY 30。 Albert is arrived， and I must take my departure。 Were he
the best and noblest of men ， and I in every respect his inferior， I
could not endure to see him in possession of such a perfect being。 Possession！
—— enough ， Wilhelm： her betrothed is here，—— a fine ， worthy
fellow， whom one cannot help liking。 Fortunately I was not present at
their meeting。 It would have broken my heart！ And he is so considerate
： he has not given Charlotte one kiss in my presence。 Heaven reward him
for it！ I must love him for the respect with which he treats her。 He
shows a regard for me ， but for this I suspect I am more indebted to
Charlotte than to his own fancy for me。 Women have a delicate tact in
such matters， and it should be so。 They cannot always succeed in keeping
two rivals on terms with each other ； but， when they do ， they are
the only gainers。
I cannot help esteeming Albert。 The coolness of his temper contrasts
strongly with the impetuosity of mine ， which I cannot conceal。 He has
a great deal of feeling ， and is fully sensible of the treasure he possesses
in Charlotte。 He is free from ill…humour， which you know is the fault
I detest most。
He regards me as a man of sense ； and my attachment to Charlotte ，
and the interest I take in all that concerns her， augment his triumph
and his love。 I shall not inquire whether he may not at times tease her
with some little jealousies ； as I know， that ， were I in his place，
I should not be entirely free from such sensations。
But ， be that as it may， my pleasure with Charlotte is over。 Call
it folly or infatuation ， what signifies a name？ The thing speaks for
itself。 Before Albert came， I knew all that I know now。 I knew I could
make no pretensions to her， nor did I offer any， that is， as far as
it was possible ， in the presence of so much loveliness， not to pant
for its enjoyment。 And now， behold me like a silly fellow， staring with
astonishment when another es in， and deprives me of my love。
I bite my lips， and feel infinite scorn for those who tell me to
be resigned ， because there is no help for it。 Let me escape from the
yoke of such silly subterfuges！ I ramble through the woods ； and when
I return to Charlotte ， and find Albert sitting by her side in the summer…house
in the garden ， I am unable to bear it ， behave like a fool ， and mit
a thousand extravagances。 〃For Heaven's sake，〃 said Charlotte today，
〃let us have no more scenes like those of last night！ You terrify me
when you are so violent。〃 Between ourselves ， I am always away now when
he visits her ： and I feel delighted when I find her alone。
AUGUST 8。 Believe me， dear Wilhelm ， I did not allude to you when
I spoke so severely of those who advise resignation to inevitable fate。
I did not think it possible for you to indulge such a sentiment。 But in
fact you are right。 I only suggest one objection。 In this world one is
seldom reduced to make a selection between two alternatives。 There are
as many varieties of conduct and opinion as there are turns of feature
between an aquiline nose and a flat one。
You will， therefore， permit me to concede your entire argument，
and yet contrive means to escape your dilemma。
Your position is this ， I hear you say ： 〃Either you have hopes
of obtaining Charlotte， or you have none。 Well ， in the first case，
pursue your course， and press on to the fulfilment of your wishes。 In
the second， be a man ， and shake off a miserable passion， which will
enervate and destroy you。〃 My dear friend ， this is well and easily said。
But would you require a wretched being， whose life is slowly wasting
under a lingering disease ， to despatch himself at once by the stroke
of a dagger ？ Does not the very disorder which consumes his strength
deprive him of the courage to effect his deliverance？
You may answer me ， if you please， with a similar analogy ， 〃Who
would not prefer the amputation of an arm to the periling of life by doubt
and procrastination ！〃 But I know not if I am right， and let us leave
these parisons。
Enough！ There are moments， Wilhelm， when I could rise up and shake
it all off， and when ， if I only knew where to go ， I could fly from
this place。
THE SAME EVENING。
My diary， which I have for some time neglected ， came before me
today ； and I am amazed to see how deliberately I have entangled myself
step by step。 To have seen my position so clearly ， and yet to have acted
so like a child ！ Even still I behold the result plainly ， and yet have
no thought of acting with greater prudence。
AUGUST lO。 If I were not a fool ， I could spend the happiest and
most delightful life here。 So many agreeable circumstances， and of a
kind to ensure a worthy man's happiness ， are seldom united。 Alas！ I
feel it too sensibly，—— the heart alone makes our happiness！ To be
admitted into this most charming family ， to be loved by the father as
a son ， by the children as a father， and by Charlotte ！ then the noble
Albert， who never disturbs my happiness by any appearance of ill…humour，
receiving me with the heartiest affection ， and loving me， next to Charlotte，
better than all the world ！ Wilhelm， you would be delighted to hear
us in our rambles ， and conversations about Charlotte。 Nothing in the
world can be more absurd than our connection， and yet the thought of
it often moves me to tears。
He tells me sometimes of her excellent mother ； how， upon her death…bed，
she had mitted her house and children to Charlotte ， and had given
Charlotte herself in charge to him； how， since that time， a new spirit
had taken possession of her ； how， in care and anxiety for their welfare，
she became a real mother to them； how every moment of her time was devoted
to some labour of love in their behalf，—— and yet her mirth and cheerfulness
had never forsaken her。 I walk by his side， pluck flowers by the way ，
arrange them carefully into a nosegay ， then fling them into the first
stream I pass ， and watch them as they float gently away。 I forget whether
I told you that Albert is to remain here。 He has received a government
appointment ， with a very good salary； and I understand he is in high
favour at court。 I have met few persons so punctual and methodical in
business。
AUGUST 12。 Certainly Albert is the best fellow in the world。 I had
a strange scene with him yesterday。 I went to take leave of him ； for
I took it into my head to spend a few days in these mountains ， from
where I now write to you。 As I was walking up and down his room ， my
eye fell upon his pistols。 〃Lend me those pistols ，〃 said I， 〃for my
journey。〃 〃By all means ，〃 he replied， 〃if you will take the trouble
to load them； for they only hang there for form。〃 I took down one of
them； and he continued ， 〃Ever since I was near suffering for my extreme
caution ， I will have nothing to do with such things。〃 I was curious
to hear the story。 〃I was staying ，〃 said he ， 〃some three months ago，
at a friend's house in the country。 I had a brace of pistols with me，
unloaded； and I slept without any anxiety。 One rainy afternoon I was
sitting by myself ， doing nothing， when it occurred to me I do not know
how that the house might be attacked， that we might require the pistols，
that we might in short， you know how we go on fancying ， when we have
nothing better to do。 I gave the pistols to the servant ， to clean and
load。 He was playing with the maid， and trying to frighten her ， when
the pistol went off —— God knows how！—— the ramrod was in the barrel
； and it went straight through her right hand， and shattered the thumb。
I had to endure all the lamentation ， and to pay the surgeon's bill；
so， since that time， I have kept all my weapons unloaded。 But ， my
dear friend ， what is the use of prudence？ We can never be on our guard
against all possible dangers。 However ，〃 —— now， you must know I can
tolerate all men till they e to 〃however ；〃 —— for it is self…evident
that every universal rule must have its exceptions。 But he is so exceedingly
accurate， that ， if he only fancies he has said a word too precipitate，
or too general， or only half true， he never ceases to qualify ， to
modify， and extenuate， till at last he appears to have said nothing
at all。 Upon this occasion， Albert was deeply immersed in his subject
： I ceased to listen to him， and became lost in reverie。 With a sudden
motion， I pointed the mouth of the pistol to my forehead ， over the
right eye。 〃What do vou mean？〃 cried Albert， turning back the pistol。
〃It is not loaded ，〃 said I。 〃And even if not，〃 he answered with impatience，
〃what can you mean？ I cannot cornprehend how a man can be so mad as to
shoot himself ， and the bare idea of it shocks me。〃
〃But why should any one ，〃 said I， 〃in speaking of an action， venture
to pronounce it mad or wise ， or good or bad ？ What is the meaning of
all this？ Have you carefully studied the secret motives of our actions？
Do you understand —— can you explain the causes which occasion them ，
and make them inevitable？ If you can ， you will be less hasty with your
decision。〃
〃But you will allow ，〃 said Albert ； 〃that some actions are criminal，
let them spring from whatever motives they may。〃 I granted it ， and shrugged
my shoulders。
〃But still， my good friend ，〃 I continued ， 〃there are some exceptions
here too。 Theft is a crime； but the man who mits it from extreme poverty，
with no design but to save his family from perishing， is he an object
of pity ， or of punishment ？ Who shall throw the first stone at a husband，
who ， in the heat of just resentment ， sacrifices his faithless wife
and her perfidious seducer？ or at the young maiden ， who， in her weak
hour of rapture ， forgets herself in the impetuous joys of love？ Even
our laws， cold and cruel as they are ， relent in such cases ， and withhold
their punishment。〃
〃That is quite another thing，〃 said Albert ； 〃because a man under
the influence of violent passion loses alI power of reflection， and is
regarded as intoxicated or insane。〃
〃Oh ！ you people of sound understandings ，〃 I replied ， smiling，
〃are ever ready to exclaim 'Extravagance， and madness， and intoxication！
' You moral men are so calm and so subdued！ You abhor the drunken man，
and detest the extravagant； you pass by， like the Levite， and thank
God ， like the Pharisee， that you are not like one of them。 I have been
more than once intoxicated， my passions have always bordered on extravagance
： I am not ashamed to confess it ； for I have learned ， by my own experience，
that all extraordinary men， who have acplished great and astonishing
actions ， have ever been decried by the world as drunken or insane。 And
in private life ， too， is it not intolerable that no one can undertake
the execution of a noble or generous deed ， without giving rise to the
exclamation that the doer is intoxicated or mad ？ Shame upon you ， ye
sages ！〃
〃This is another of your extravagant humours，〃 said Albert ： 〃you
always exaggerate a case， and in this matter you are undoubtedly wrong
； for we were speaking of suicide， which you pare with great actions，
when it is impossible to regard it as anything but a weakness。 It is much
easier to die than to bear a life of misery with fortitude。〃
I was on the point of breaking off the conversation ， for nothing
puts me so pletely out of patience as the utterance of a wretched monplace
when I am talking from my inmost heart。 However ， I posed myself，
for I had often heard the same observation with sufficient vexation ；
and I answered him， therefore， with a little warmth ， 〃You call this
a weakness—— beware of being led astray by appearances。 When a nation，
which has long groaned under the intolerable yoke of a tyrant ， rises
at last and throws off its chains ， do you call that weakness？ The man
who